the dumbing down of love

The Girl

Aly. 21. Las Vegas, Nevada. Dreamer, schemer, and make believer. I'm everything you know and everything you can't understand. I'm full of contradictions and misconceptions. I love without holding back and can change your life if you let me. Never underestimate me because that will be your biggest mistake. Myspace Flickr

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Sunday, November 13, 2005

that feeling of any form of comfort is gone. all i think of is....

one more bad thing could kill me...or i could not notice it at all. is my heart beating? i cant feel it. i cant feel you. i cant. i feel sick.

ive learned that people dont worry about you unless they can see the problem. clothing and make up can cover a lot. i asked today if i should go and get food or just be hungry. the response i got was are you trying to control something. nodding was all i could do. the marks on my leg screamed yes. something has to be mine..

there is no point in sleeping..or being awake for that matter. the darkness seems to poke and prod me towards untrue things. its to late to take something...i have to go visit god in the morning.

i told one of the most important people in my life a secret today. they were unhappy to say the least and want to hurt people because of my secret. they cared more than you, all you did was repeat the crime in a different form.

something drastic...always something drastic in the aftermath of you. snip snip snip and possibly some color changes. waves of emotion and then silence.

i hope you choke on what you have done. i hope the words and memories get caught in your throat and make your heart ache.

Alysa [ 4:29 AM ]

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